


To Hope and To Dream

by Jihuned



Category: Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Basically everyone in Produce 101, Gen, I APOLOGIZE, basically a Produce 101 fic, except in the eyes of Youngjae, summary sucks, what do i tag
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-02
Updated: 2018-03-27
Packaged: 2018-11-22 12:09:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,284
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11379915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jihuned/pseuds/Jihuned
Summary: "We're not a team, this is a competition."101 trainees, 101 dreams. Only 11 will reach theirs in this program.Youngjae officially steps into the cruel corrupted idol world with Produce 101. He only hopes he'll come out unscathed.





	1. First

The corridor loomed ahead and Youngjae could see the entrance to the studio, feeling his heart thumping against his chest with every step he took. He cracked his knuckles. He was Youngjae. He was the Kim Youngjae. There is no reason for him to be nervous. Pasting a smile on his face, he walked out.

The seats were already half-filled and he was taken aback at the loudness of the greetings when he bowed and greeted them. His sight immediately zoomed in on the eye catching first sofa at the very top and the person sitting on it comfortably. Well then.

Climbing up the stairs slowly, he made his way to the only sofa that was empty. “Lucky seven,” he mumbled with a grin before settling down. “Who knows, this might be my first and last chance of sitting here.”

The rest came in company by company and Youngjae took the chance to look at the ones sitting down, trying to see if he could recognize any of them. He could definitely recognize the ones who caught the media’s attention when joining the program but other than that, it was rather hard to tell when most of them have their backs facing him.

Then BoA came in and everyone exploded into raucous applause. Youngjae joined and quieted down when she started to speak. The introduction was rather short and for that he was glad, he could barely even keep his eyes open during that three minutes introduction.

The evaluations started and against his will, Youngjae felt his eyes closed. He could hear the trainees’ voices though, and marveled at how some of their vocals were amazing.

“Hey!”

Youngjae startled awake, almost slipping off the sofa before he grasped the side. He could feel his ears burning and knew they were red from the attention he was receiving from those sitting around him. The female staff beside him mentioned for him to head backstage to prepare for his performance.

“Ah yes, sorry,” he sheepishly apologized, wiping evidence of sleep away from his eyes and walked down slowly, wishing there was a handrail to hold when his sight started to blur. His feet caught on the last step and he stumbled forward, managing to avoid the camera as he spun around to the side.

“Oh god,” the near encounter had his heart thumping and waking him up. “Okay, I'm awake.” Youngjae continued walking to the table, but he could hear a few chuckles behind him and knew his incident had not gone amiss.

His name tag was on the table and he picked it up, struggling a little with tearing the tag but he succeeded in the end and stuck the tag on his shirt. Looking up, he was startled at his image in the mirror.

“Wow, I look terrible,” Youngjae winced and tried to smooth his fringe down to hide his slightly swollen eyes to no avail. His dark circles were obvious and Youngjae tore his eyes away from mirror, preventing further damage to his pride.

He patiently waited as the previous group walked off the stage and he congratulated them, amazed at the performance they had put up. One had composed the song and another had choreographed the dance. Admittedly, the song had sounded a little like Got7’s Hard Carry but that was probably because the beats had been the same. The choreography though, had blew him away.

The microphone was passed to him and he jogged up the stairs, tripping on the last step and nearly falling flat on his face. Well, he probably should have stop practicing yesterday but who was he to know an hour of sleep screwed up his coordination so bad? Okay, maybe it was from the accumulated lack of sleep but this is Produce 101 and Youngjae was determined to get a good rank and that screentime.

“Hello, I'm a YNB trainee, Kim Youngjae.” He said into the microphone, frowning when he realised his words were slightly slurred.

“Are you usually very clumsy?” BoA asked and Youngjae winced.

“No, I guess it's just the nerves,” he replied, feeling his ear flushed hot with embarrassment again.

“Well, let's see your performance,” BoA smiled and Youngjae dropped into his starting position. The music played and Youngjae’s limbs moved, dancing out movements he had went through thousands of times. He sang and winced when his voice came out wobbly, and he nearly cracked when he did the high note. Seokhoon and Yumi frowned immediately, sharing glances and no, Youngjae did not spent all his days in the practice room only to have this type of performance shown.

He danced, putting more energy into his movements and his heart stopped when he _just knew_ , could feel his right feet getting caught behind his left leg even as he moved forward.

He was falling.

No no no no no NO.

He threw his entire body forward, hands planted on the surface of the floor before he pushed himself off and bend his body, and because there's still some energy left he swung his hands up, tucked his legs under his chin and spun, landing on his feet a little after the song ended.

All he heard was his heavy breathing through the blood rushing in his ears. How could he screw up his performance that bad? He could have done better, knew he could have done better and really this just charted at the bottom of all his practices.

“We couldn't really see anything from you, to us it's just a cover of Beautiful,” Kahi said and Youngjae nodded. They didn't ask him for any other performances, and he already knew what his grade was going to be. It was worse since he went after BNM’s group and his performance looks like a child fooling around compared to theirs.

“Kim Youngjae…F. As a six month trainee, we think you'll be able to learn a lot more in that level,” BoA announced and he numbly bowed before walking off the stage. Six month trainee huh. He bit back a scoff, he's been training for two years since he was fourteen and had only recently transferred to YNB and well, his performance was just a plain insult to him and his past trainers.

Receiving the F sticker with a small smile, he managed to recover his composure in the little time he took to pasting the alphabet beside his name and even managed to shot off a small “fighting!” to the next group who were clad in denim.

He stumbled up to his seat and two males sitting beside him offered small smiles, one reaching over to pat his shoulder. Youngjae returned the smile, sat in his seat and promptly drifted off to dreamland, only to be woken when filming ended and they had to move to their dorms.

He was the first in his room and he dumped his bag on the top level of the bunk bed before walking around, taking the chance to look at the place he's going to live in for hopefully the next three months.

The door cracked open and he turned around to see a mop of black hair sticking out.

“Hello,” he grinned and the boy grinned back, pulling the door open to reveal his entire self and his luggage.

“Hello! I'm Cube’s Yoo Seonho,” the boy introduced himself, throwing his bag onto the bed below Youngjae’s.

“The chick trainee,” Youngjae nodded. He had been awake to see Cube’s performance and it was rather unexpected that he remembered their faces.

Another male ambled in, a smile wide on his face and he introduced himself as Jisung, taking the other lower deck bed. Youngjae recognized him as the gossip queen from the gossip boys who had sat a level below him.

The next didn't come in until a few minutes later but the cheery room was made even brighter with his presence. Cre.ker Haknyeon introduced himself and as soon as the trio found out he was from Jeju, they had requested for him to say something and no matter how hard they tried, they couldn't even decipher it.

“Oh wow,” Haknyeon opened his closet to find the grey sweaters hanging on the rails.

“As much as I like grey, I want to wear something pink,” Jisung pouted.

“Pink is acidic,” Youngjae absentmindedly said as he took off his shirt and slipped on the grey sweater.

“What?”

Youngjae looked up to see three faces staring at him in confusion. “Oh, grey is basic and it's for F while A has pink, and the opposite of basic is acidic.”

“That's… that's the worse joke I ever had the displeasure to hear,” Jisung commented and they burst into laughter.

The roommates immediately quietened down when the speaker crackled and there was an announcement for them to gather back in the studio with their sweaters on. The other three hurriedly changed and Youngjae walked out of the room when Seonho suddenly jumped on him.

“Away!” Seonho commanded and Youngjae rolled his eyes but complied, speeding down the hallway and jostling Seonho as much as he could. He could distantly hear a “Kids no running!” from Jisung and was aware of all the eyes on him but he didn't care.

A moment later and there was another figure running beside Youngjae. He startled, turning to look at the side only to see a redhead carrying a blond hair male and recognizing them from BNM. The red head pulled ahead and Youngjae could hear Seonho shouting indignantly above him and ran harder, ignoring Seonho’s sharp knees digging into his ribs.

They spill out of the hallway and into the studio and stopped short when the trainers’ eyes went to them immediately. The grins on their faces immediately dropped. Letting Seonho go, the four bowed before heading to where the staff waved them to.

“I'm Daehwi,” the blond said, eyes sparkling and the red head introduced himself as Park Woojin.

Seonho and Youngjae introduced themselves and they chatted for a while, waiting for the rest to file in before they had to separate to join their own groups.

One of the staff clapped the slate and the trainees were told that they were going to be watching and learning their theme song.

The song played and the trainees gave the appropriate reactions before BoA stepped up the stage again.

“This is why we assigned you to your levels,” she said. “You'll sing the chorus first before Jaeseung will teach you the harder parts of the choreography and you'll have ten minutes to learn them.”

Each trainees had scripts and Youngjae went through the song, straining to hit the high notes when he should have no problems with them. He really was in a bad condition. A class was asked to go first and Youngjae noticed most had difficulty hitting the high notes while B had less difficulty.

“A should watch out, B is doing better than you,” Seokhoon said and Youngjae resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

F class was the last and when it came to the high notes, those who could do them raised their volume while those who couldn't mumbled.

“Not bad,” Seokhoon said approvingly and there were relieved faces.

The mood dropped after Jaeseung went through the dance moves though, and there were groans as the lower ranked trainees struggled to keep up. Youngjae could no the dance no problem, although he picked it up slower than usual and his movements weren't as clear as he would like them to be.

“I'm screwed,” Seonho groaned beside him and Hyunbin -his tag reads- nodded. Youngjae watched as they share a smile and felt a stab of loneliness.

“Need help?” He offered and his offer was happily accepted. He helped to keep count, going slow at first and then going faster.

“No, don't put your weight on your right leg, it'll take more time to shift and you don't have time,” Youngjae readjusted Hyunbin. Seonho was doing well and could do it, albeit a little slower. Hyunbin on the other hand, was the one that needed lots of work, he was all gangly limbs flying everywhere and awkwardness was oozing out of him. It was obvious he didn't have much experience dancing before.

“The first thing about dancing, is to be confident. Think ‘I can dance, I will dance and I will put it off splendidly’.”

When Hyunbin looked at him dubiously, Youngjae mastered up enough energy to grin. “Fake it till you make it, no?”

Time was up and again, they had to go up in groups. Everyone in A could keep up and the rest were left gaping in awe and some in envy. Youngjae noticed Seongwoo -he remembered the male after watching his legendary freestyle popping performance- lagging slightly, but that was to be expected, the best freestylers always have trouble with choreography. Woojin drew his attention, the male had been quiet and seemed introverted but his dancing was clearly top tier.

B was next and their singing was clearly better than their dance. C and D was a mixed of good, average and bad and F was clearly the worst. There were a few in the group who could keep up, and Youngjae saw Jisung having no trouble with the choreography. It made him wonder why Jisung was even placed in F in the first place, from what he saw Jisung had no problem with his vocals and dance. Maybe he was like Youngjae during his performance?

There was two other males in the F class who could keep up, Taedong and Yehyun, he noted. The information would come in useful when it comes to group evaluation.

Youngjae stood behind Hyunbin and Seonho and he could see the exact moment when they gave up, opting to shoot each other confused looks and apologetic ones at him.

“We have three days to learn the dance anyway,” he told the duo cheerfully as they were lead out of the studio and to the practice rooms.

Jaeseung came in and they spent the next hour going through the first half of the dance. Youngjae already had the dance memorized, next was just refining his movements. When he met the eyes of Jaeseung, a warm glow coursed through him when the dance teacher nodded in approval.

Youngjae sat at the side of the room with the rest while some continued to dance and others gathered around Yehyun, getting help from the male. He noticed Taedong dancing silently at the side beside him and when he listened closely, he could hear the male singing. It was stable, although he couldn't reach the high note.

_That's an A right there._

Youngjae was startled out of his thought when a grey body crashed into him from the side. “I'm hungry,” his attacker moaned, snuggling into Youngjae’s lap with his arms tightly grabbing Youngjae’s body

Youngjae patted Seonho’s head gently. The two were only a month apart with Youngjae born in December 2001 and Seonho in January 2002, but Seonho feels and acts as if he was way younger.

“Dogpile!” Jisung announced, flying in from the other side, knocking Youngjae over. The other males in the room looked over, curious at the commotion. Youngjae eyes widened when he saw Hyunbin running over to join, a maniacal smile on the older’s face and he felt the impact when Hyunbin jumped and landed on them.

This triggered a series of response and Youngjae found himself at the bottom of the stack, breathing in the manly stink and sweat and finding butts in his face with sharp elbows digging into his body. Seonho was flailing under him and Youngjae tried to elevate pressure off him by lifting his body up the ground, and feeling movements from below, the rest slowly got up, leaving a winded Seonho and Youngjae gasping in fresh air on the floor.

“Say chicks!” Jisung announced, in his hands a DSLR he probably gotten from the staff somewhere. Youngjae lazily lifted his fingers to show a V and he watched Haknyeon slide in from the side to pose beside him. Seonho’s arm landed heavily on his stomach as the male cuddled into him from the side.

Youngjae might be in a survival program, but right now the only thing he felt was happiness.


	2. Second

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a filler chapter but I guess it's needed

It was the second day after Youngjae moved into the dorm and Youngjae felt more alive after a solid eight hours of sleep. After breakfast, all the trainees had headed to their respective classes’ practice rooms. Currently, the time was nearing four in the afternoon and the mirror was fogged up with sweat. Youngjae looked on lazily as the other trainees decided to scribble onto the mirror.

He was distracted when a group of F class trainees came in and announced for Room Fourteen and Fifteen trainees to make their way to the practice room one.

Youngjae reluctantly clambered to his feet, dragged by a much too energetic Seonho and Hyunbin. The eight of them made their way to practice room one and greeted the staff there.

“We’ll be doing the ‘meringue time’ today, Jisung you're up first. The rest please wait by the side,” the staff briskly told them and the eight moved to the area behind the camera and sat on the seats laid out.

“Hello national producers, I'm MMO Yoon Jisung. It’s meringue time!” Jisung exclaimed and immediately cracked the egg. Within moments, the egg white was in the bowl and he was whisking away, all the while chattering about the best way to separate the egg white from the egg yolk.

“I didn't even know what meringue was before this,” Youngjae whispered to Seonho and the boy nodded in agreement, watching in fascination as Jisung kept on talking even though his hand was whisking so fast, all he could see was a blur.

With one minute and fifteen seconds left, Jisung held the bowl up over his head and squealed in surprise, eyes wide when he didn't feel any egg white dripping onto his hair. He gleefully receive the blue board and introduced himself again, sharing about himself in the one minute he had left. When time ran out, he neatly finished with a thank you and bowed, thereafter dancing out of the camera view and towards the rest.

“That was really tiring,” Jisung shook his limp hand as Youngjae got up for his turn.

“Hello national producers,” Youngjae bowed, smiling at the camera. “For you, I'll be making meringue. It’s meringue time!” He proclaimed and cracked the egg. With a few turns, the egg white slipped into the bowl and Youngjae tossed the rest into the container, grabbing the whisk and the bowl.

He silently whisked the egg white, and within a few seconds started feeling the burn.

“Wah, it's really tiring!” He grunted, focusing on keeping up the speed. He could feel the sweat beading up on his neck and sliding down his back but he ignored them and continued. Without a pause he switched hands and continued whisking, alternating hands every so often.

He peered at the egg white dubiously, wondering if it was solid enough. Oh well, here goes nothing.

Cringing and waiting for something wet to land on his hair, Youngjae opened his eyes in surprised when he felt something sharp poking him in the chest. Looking down, it was the blue board for those who succeeded. With a whoop of glee, he placed the bowl down and grabbed it.

“Hello national producers! I'm Kim Youngjae from YNB entertainment. Er,” Youngjae floundered for something to say. “This is my first time making meringue, and it's a really tiring experience but for the national producers, I tried my best!” He inwardly cringe at such cheesy lines. “I'll continue doing my best in the future, so please do look after me. Thank you!” He finished just in time with a bow and heaved a sigh of relief, grinning as he walked out of the camera’s view.

The group quickly wrapped up, with the staff ushering them out of the door and the next group already waiting outside. When they returned to the F class practice room, they immediately joined in on the mass practice, with Youngjae taking over Yehyun as the latter went for a break, looking pale in the face.

“One and two and three and four,” Youngjae counted as he went through the movements slowly, looking in the mirror at the others copying his movements. They were okay with the movements since Yehyun had already covered that with them, but dancing with the music was another thing.

“Okay, we’ll run through one more time, and then we’ll go again with the music, okay?” All Youngjae saw was nodding heads and with a deep breath, he started.

“The moment I saw you,” he sang, voice coming out strong and echoing through the practice room. “Pick me, pick me, pick me. My eyes were fixed on you.” Since it was merely the start, the other trainees had no problem with it. It was only at the back when they started lagging, and a few of them had trouble with the fast dance at the climax.

It was to be expected, and Youngjae went through the movements for the climax again.

“While moving your weight from the right to the left, punch your hands out fortyfive degrees down, then ninety degrees and then another forty five degrees up and then fold your hands back in,” Youngjae watched with narrowed eyes as the trainees complied. “Yeah, that's good! Okay, now do it again,” Youngjae repeated the movements and the trainees followed, “and again… and again… and again.”

When they were all doing the same movements again and again, Youngjae could see how their transition from one position to another were getting smoother, and the awkwardness flowing from them slowed down to a trickle as they got used to it.

“Okay, let's start from the top.” The music played and Youngjae watched. When the music ended, the practicing group of trainees received a huge round of applause from the others, having done the entire round perfectly.

“Great! You improved a lot,” Youngjae beamed. To be honest, he had felt a little awkward at the start teaching the trainees who were mostly older than him, and some having trained longer than him, but the easy going manner the trainees all interacted with him had caused him to be more relaxed, and remarks and comments fall off him lips more easily than at the start. It had helped that Taedong and Yehyun had the same opinions as him and since they were seen as the ones having more experience and knowledge, the reception towards his opinions was more open.

“And now it's time for dinner!” Jisung said and as a group, heads turned collectively to look at the clock sitting on the wall. It read seven and there was a mad dash for the door.

Youngjae found Haknyeon in the chaos and they went down to the cafeteria together. The other classes were already at the canteen, since F class was the last to have their dinner. Seonho was already sitting at a table and he waved at them eagerly as Youngjae and Haknyeon received their measly dinner. The rest of the F class slowly joined them and in the end, it was an entire group of grey.

“We’re only sitting by our classes,” Youngjae commented. Seonho looked up, his mouth stuffed full with rice, glasses sitting lopsidedly on his nose. He took in the entire cafeteria and nodded vigorously, and his glasses very nearly flew off his face.

“I want to talk to Guanlin though,” Seonho peered towards his label mate sitting at the table filled with greens.

“It's awkward for us to join,” Haknyeon poked at his food, and Youngjae immediately disliked the soft sad voice coming out of him. Haknyeon had been a bubbly existence, in the practice room and in the dorm and seeing him unusually meek cause Youngjae to frown.

“Hey, look! There's Jisung!” Seonho mumbled through his filled mouth and Youngjae turned around to see Jisung joining the B class table. The table of orange was startled to see the grey clad male but was welcoming as a pink haired male shuffled in to make space for Jisung. Jisung struck up a conversation with the occupants of the table immediately and seeing that, Seonho stood up.

“I'm going to see Guanlin,” he announced. “Come with me.” With a shared glance, Youngjae shrugged and stood up to follow the chick with a goal in mind. Haknyeon followed and soon, the trainees were more or less moving about, mixed colours in every group.

Youngjae somehow found himself in between Nuest members and he blinked at Seonho sitting in front of him, in the same position but chatting away with Guanlin and not minding the awkwardness. Youngjae spy Haknyeon a few seats away from him and Hyunbin was right beside Minhyun who was sitting beside him and where did all these friendships come from did he missed something?

Youngjae snuck a glance at Dongho sitting beside him and his eyes flitted away when he met Dongho’s eyes. Dongho looked scary, the stubbles of his beards only adding to his scariness and Youngjae knew for certain MNet will portray Dongho with a gangster image. He knew the entertainment industry like it's the back of his hand after all.

“Hello,” he said, inwardly wincing as his voice came out in a squeak and jabbed at his rice. “I'm Youngjae.”

“Are you talking to your food?” Youngjae looked up to see an amused smirk on Dongho’s face. “I'm Dongho,” he offered, when words failed Youngjae.

“I know,” Youngjae replied. He's a fan of Nuest’s songs, but wasn't entirely into them seeing as he didn't even have time for himself between his studies and practice.

“You look better today. Did you get enough sleep?” Dongho said and Youngjae gawked at him. How did Dongho even know he wasn't getting enough sleep and how on earth did he remember him out of one hundred other trainees? “You're seventeen (A/N: Korean age, so internationally, Youngjae is sixteen),” he continued, seeing Youngjae’s confused expression. As if Youngjae’s age has something to do with Dongho remembering him.

“I don't understand,” Youngjae finally replied.

“He looks out for the younger ones,” Minhyun piped in from the other side of Youngjae before turning to continue his conversation with Hyunbin.

Youngjae stared at Dongho before a grin spreader across his face. “You're a softie,” he accused. Minhyun suddenly snorted in the middle of his conversation with Hyunbin and Youngjae doesn't even have to guess that he's listening in on the conversation.

Dongho paused in the middle, his spoon halting its in journey to his mouth. “I prefer kind,” he said.

Youngjae shook his head. “Softie,” He repeated. “Dongsoftie!”

A resigned sigh escaped from Dongho as the male shove Youngjae’s tray closer to him. “Just eat your food, kid.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My condolences to Dongho and his family. May his father rest in peace.


	3. Third

Youngjae switched on the camera, smiling at it quickly before walking to the center of the room. The other trainees were nervously watching from the side, and he spy Seonho mouthing a  _ fighting! _ with Jisung throwing thumbs up at him. The first trainee to go always had the most pressure and that was currently Youngjae now.

 

His heart was thumping against his chest and he placed a hand on it.  _ Who am I? I'm Kim Youngjae. I will slay this. _

 

“Hello trainers, I'm F class Kim Youngjae,” he said confidently even as his heart threatened to pound out of his chest. The music started and he nodded to the beat, his body following muscle memory. With a grin on his face, he turned around, pausing to wink at the camera. His voice burst out from his body, he was in top condition, having make sure to sleep as much as he could no matter where he was and he was high on adrenaline he thought he could fly.

 

Then the jump came and he leapt into the air, arms spreading out to the sides in a straight line. For one moment, he thought he'll hang in the air forever, until gravity pulled him back to the ground.

 

With his remaining energy, he belted out the last note and kneeled on the floor, whipping his left hand out in the ending pose. When the music died off, he stood and bowed before running out of the camera’s view and jumping into the group of grey bodied males.

 

“How did I do?” He asked excitedly and was pleased when everyone said he did well. Over the course of the three days, he had grown close to everyone in the F class and while it was hard for him to approach people, the fact that he was the youngest in the class along with Seonho had people approaching him instead and he soon found himself pampered and loved.

 

Youngjae kept his eyes opened for the rest, making minute movements when the others forgotten the dance before a staff member told him to stop. There had been a scary moment when Yehyun paused halfway through the dance, swayed on the spot and collapsed onto the ground. The F class were in an uproar and everyone had swarmed over to him, trying to check on the male who had devoted his practice time to teaching them the dance. Youngjae only felt himself relaxed when the staff tended to Yehyun and notified them that he'll be fine after a good rest.

 

The rest of the time was spent comforting those who didn't manage to show what they had practiced. It was the worst feeling, seeing the friends who had put all their blood sweat tears into practicing the dance, knowing they did their best and tried their hardest only to freeze up with nerves before the camera and forget.

 

Hyunbin returned from his attempt and although Youngjae could tell he was trying his hardest to hold them back, the tears were already sliding down his cheeks. With no words to offer, Youngjae could only wrapped his arms around the lanky male and feeling Seonho’s arms snake under his stomach to wrap around Hyunbin too.

 

The male calmed down after a while and they returned to watching, although Youngjae looped his arm around Hyunbin’s and left it there for the remaining period.

 

F class had the most people so when they were finally dismissed to head for dinner, the other classes were already there. Their dinner was a measly bowl of rice with some side dishes and a bowl of chicken soup and Youngjae wolfed his down hungrily after giving some of the rice to Seonho. The bowl of chicken soup headed towards Hyunbin, Youngjae knew how much the guy could eat after the first meal where it happened before the unfair food system took place.

 

After dinner was free time for the trainees while the judges evaluated their videos. It was the first full break they ever had and Youngjae headed to his room, intent on catching up on his sleep.

 

When he was walking through the hallway, an arm suddenly grabbed his and he was yanked into a room.

 

With a yelp, he turned around to see Daehwi smiling at him.

 

“You nearly gave me a heart attack!” Youngjae whined as his heartbeat finally slowed down. He peered around to find males clad in the various colors of A to F class sitting on the bunks and on the floor of the room. Seonho was with Guanlin at one side and someone was on the top bunk -Youngjae couldn't see who it was- with little Woojin and the BNM boys on the floor.

 

“What's the occasion?” He asked, bewildered as those present in the room looked up and greeted the newcomer.

 

“Nothing much, just thought we could spend the time getting to know each other better! Want to be my partner in crime and abduct anyone who passes by this room until we can't fit anyone in anymore?” Daehwi grinned and Youngjae mirrored his expression.

 

They waited behind the door, and Youngjae noticed Jisung heading their way with the pink haired male. Signaling Daehwi, they crouched behind the door before throwing it open and pulling the two startled males in. Daehwi grabbed Jisung while Youngjae grabbed the other and tugged the two into the room.

 

The scream from Jisung was so high pitched and unexpected, Youngjae was soon down on the floor, clutching his stomach. He took a look at Jisung’s face and burst into laughter again. 

 

“Stop it!” Jisung pouted, stamping his feet. Youngjae laughter soon became chuckles and he got back on his feet, Jisung having settled in a spot in the room. The pink-haired dude chose to sit beside Woojin on the floor. 

 

“Let's try the ‘thug gangster kidnapper’ concept,” Daehwi said and Youngjae nodded without a thought. Daehwi went out first, casually leaning against the wall. Youngjae could pinpoint the moment he saw someone and that was when his face grew terrified and he darted back into the room immediately. 

 

“It's Dongho! I can't do it,” Daehwi shivered and Youngjae chuckled. After the scary first meeting with Dongho during dinner that ended pretty well yesterday, Youngjae couldn’t see why he thought Dongho was scary now.

 

“He isn't scary,” Youngjae tried to convince Daehwi but the same aged male shook his head.

 

“Let's just join the rest,” Daehwi said, having lost all excitement in scaring those passing by and apparently decided there was already more than enough people in the room. Daehwi joined Jisung and Youngjae squeezed himself between Woojin and the pink haired male. Seonho immediately wrapped his arms around Youngjae from the side and Youngjae turned his head only to see Seonho half out of the bed with his lower half on Guanlin’s lap.

 

“That can't be comfortable,” Youngjae said but Seonho grinned, burying his face into Youngjae’s neck.

 

“Okay, time for introductions everyone!” Jisung clapped his hands and quickly said his name and agency and the introductions in one circle. Youngjae found out the other two males from BNM were called Youngmin and Donghyun, and the pink haired male was Daniel, the labelmate of Jisung. He was surprised to see a familiar face looking down from the top bunk beside little Woojin, and grinned at the smiling face of Bae Jinyoung.

 

“I brought Monopoly!” Daehwi pulled out the board game from his closet with a flourish and immediately, Jinyoung and little Woojin scrambled down from the top bunk. The rest shifted to accommodate the two and Youngjae found a Jinyoung making himself comfortable on his lap. He propped his head on Jinyoung’s shoulder, scanning through the cards the latter held in his hands.

 

“Bad cards,” he commented. “Your luck sucks.” The comment was accompanied by a shove from Jinyoung and Youngjae nearly toppled onto the floor, Jinyoung going down with him.

 

“The first cards doesn't matter,” Jinyoung insisted, up until he kept drawing useless cards. Seonho was peering at their cards over their shoulder and he shot Jinyoung a glance.

 

“Youngjae is right, your luck sucks,” he said very seriously and at that, Jinyoung threw his cards down in frustration, declaring them out of the game. It doesn't matter anyway, Jinyoung didn't even have any properties, it didn't even seem he was playing.

 

They watched as a game of monopoly turned into chaos, frenzied shouting and accusations and sneaky thefts. Daehwi and Jisung were on a full out shouting match, with Daniel chuckling at the side and big Woojin secretly palming a few notes into his and Daehwi’s money pile. Youngmin was trying to settle the agitated duo down, with Donghyun spurring them on until the alpaca lookalike turned his gaze on the church boy and that effectively shut the latter up.

 

The other five occupants of the room merely sat huddled together, watching with wide eyes as they chomped on a packet of chips Seonho had produced out of nowhere.

 

The arguing duo finally calmed down with the help of Youngmin and they turned to see the five youngest in the room blinking at them.

 

“So, should we end the game?” Youngjae finally asked, after much poking and prodding from the other four surrounding him (Guanlin not so much since they were close, but he could feel the heavy gaze on him from the boy).

 

Jisung blinked at him and then looked down at the mess of cards scattered on the floor. That and the significantly larger pile of money by big Woojin’s side.

 

“Yeah, we probably should.”

 

Immediately, the five youngest brightened and they helped out in the packing of the monopoly board. When they were in the midst of deciding what to do next, a knock sounded and a head poked in.

 

“Hey guys,” the male said. “We asked the staff and they allowed us to watch a movie in the auditorium. It's going to start in fifteen minutes, so gather your friends grab some food and make yourself comfortable there.” 

 

He closed the door, only to reopen it. “I'm Geonhee by the way, from RBW!” With that said, he disappeared, probably to inform the other trainees.

 

“Well, I'm going to my room to get food. Meet you guys back here and we can walk over together?” Jisung asked and affirmative nods were his reply.

 

The three roommates returned to their rooms and each grabbed a packet of snacks, with Youngjae dragging Seonho out of the room before the little chick decided to bring all the food he brought. Haknyeon was nowhere to be seen, but they'll probably see him again at the auditorium.

 

They walked briskly to the auditorium and Youngjae found himself beside Daniel.

 

“Are you Korean?” He asked in curiosity and Daniel nodded his head.

 

“My name was Euigeon, but I changed it to Daniel since lots of people have trouble pronouncing it right. Even my father couldn't,” he said with a laugh. “I studied in Canada before, so I decided to adopt an English name instead.” 

 

“Oh! That's cool, I've never been to Canada.”

 

Their conversation ended when Seonho and Guanlin started running, having enough of the winter cold and the rest followed, laughing and stumbling over each other to enter the heated building. When they reached the auditorium, the trainees were more or less already there. Finding enough seats didn't turn out to be a problem though, since there were more than enough to fit all of them.

 

The loud chatter quieted down into soft murmurings when the lights dimmed and the movie started playing. When the head of a mannequin first appeared, Youngjae bit back a groan. No wonder the staff had allowed them to watch a movie. They probably wanted the reactions for the previews, and Youngjae was honestly just thankful it wasn't Miracle in Cell Number 7. He had yet to watch the tearjerker and if he had his way -which he have and will continue to have- it would continue to stay unwatched. 

 

“Hey,” he whispered to Jisung. “I'll go back to the dorm first.”

 

“You're not staying to watch? It's Train to Busan!” 

 

“I've watched it too many times to count,” Youngjae grinned at the indignant look on Jisung’s face.

 

Seonho poked his head from around Jisung. “You're leaving? Can I have your food?”

 

Youngjae probably should have expected that question. With a chuckle, he passed his bag of potato chips to Seonho and moved silently out of the auditorium, carefully closing the door. When he turned around, he jolted back at the figure standing before him.

 

“You aren't going to watch?” Moonbok asked and Youngjae shook his head. 

 

“Enjoy,“ Youngjae stepped aside for Moonbok to enter. He braved the cold to return to the room and promptly fell asleep on his bed after washing up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not exactly pleased with my writing but what exactly does one converse about OTL cons of not having a social life


	4. Fourth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Double update so make sure you've read the third chapter!

The cameras were all rolling and the trainees sat stiffly on the floor, the room for once completely silent. Kahi walked into the room and straight towards the little round table they had placed in front of the mirror.

 

Youngjae had no idea why they even decide to place it there, since they didn't even put the cards on it.

 

Kahi started calling out names, and as trainees collected their cards, Youngjae tried to squish his nervousness down. He was in F, it was impossible for him to drop any further.

 

He was only in F class but there were writhing snakes in his stomach.  _ I can't even begin to fathom how nervous the A class must feel now _ , he mused.

 

Hyunbin received his card and Youngjae perked up, knowing his name would be called soon. The faces of those who went before him were impassive, like what the staff had told them to, but Youngjae could see the change in Taedong’s expression, a slight tilt of his mouth upwards.

 

“Kim Youngjae.” 

 

Youngjae scrambled to his feet and walked awkwardly to the table, feeling everyone’s eyes on him. He received his card and nervously glance at Kahi but her expression was indecipherable and Youngjae returned his attention to the card. His hands were trembling slightly and he doubted that Kahi didn't noticed.

 

_ A,  _ the stamp read and Youngjae’s poker face slide into place even as the heavy feeling in his chest eased and his steps back feel way lighter.

 

The rest of the cards were quickly given out after that, and then the reassembling of trainees started.

 

When the doors open to accept the F trainees, the original trainees didn't clap, but they did offer welcoming and warm smiles. Youngjae wasn't surprised to see Guanlin entering the room, but he was taken aback by how fast Seonho flew to the older boy and dragged him to sit with the rest of them.

 

It was then the D class and a few of the F trainees stood up, Jisung one of them. They left the room with applause following them and Youngjae shot a thumbs up at Jisung.

 

It was then C class and B class and the numbers of F trainees continue to dwindle. And then finally, A class.

 

“Those who made it to A class, please move,” the staff called out. Silence hung in the air, everyone looking around wondering who had made such a huge jump. Youngjae didn't want to be the first to stand up and so sat stiffly, back ramrod straight. To his relief, Taedong made his move. Applause and congratulations were showered upon Taedong and when the male smiled and bowed, Youngjae silently stood up. He didn't know what he was expecting, but the amount of congratulations he received and the smiles only burdened him.

 

On one hand, he was definitely glad to have entered A class. On the other, it was painful to leave his friends behind. But it wasn't like they weren't going to talk anymore, soon, the classes wouldn't even matter.

 

With a bow, he and Taedong made their way out of the room. Youngjae was asked to wait at the canteen as Taedong made his way into the A class practice room. The silence was suffocating and anxious, Youngjae jogged on the spot, shaking and loosening his limbs.

 

“Youngjae, you can go up now,” one of the female staff member said with an encouraging smile and thanking her, he slowly walked up to the practice room. From far, he could see the row of trainees who made it sitting in a line separately from the original A trainees and before he even reached the room, he could feel the tension emitting from the A trainees.

 

They probably hadn't received their cards yet, judging from the faces when Youngjae opened the door. He had eye contact with big Woojin and offered him a smile the latter barely managed to return.

 

“Congratulations,” BoA said and Youngjae bowed as he sat beside Taedong.

 

He took the chance to look at the rest, and smiled when he saw little Woojin and Daniel grinning at him.

 

“Daehwi,” BoA called out and the mentioned boy stood. Youngjae could see the nervousness in the tightness of his face which smoothened out when he opened the card. BoA said her usual line and Daehwi bowed and then the procedure repeated. Seongwoo was the last to be called out and his shoulders were stiff as he walked towards her. Youngjae wasn't terribly concerned though, he knew Seongwoo would stay in A, unless he had majorly screwed up the dance.

 

A wide smile spread across the male’s face as he let out a sigh of relief.

 

“Congratulations,” BoA smiled. “All the A members have maintained their ranks, and a good job to those who have moved up. You did well.” 

 

The trainees all stood up when the staff cued them to and bowed, then proceeded to celebrate wildly around the place. Youngjae joined and then suddenly there was a group hug, everyone in the circle and hopping in one direction. They soon broke apart, although Youngjae kept his arm slung around big Woojin, the latter smiling as he stared at the others fooling around with him.

 

“Jinjin!” Youngjae declared. He had contemplated whether to say it out loud or not, but was thankful he did when he saw the startled look on the redhead’s face. “You're Jinjin, and he's Woojin.” Youngjae pointed towards little Woojin. The quickest way to be comfortable with someone is to give them a nickname and Youngjae already has designated nicknames for those he wanted to know better, although said nicknames might be lacking.

 

“Jaejae,” Woojin replied with an uncertain grin, the hint of his snaggletooth peeking through.

 

“Woojae, cross!” Youngjae joked and Woojin seemed to have gotten the reference, for he laughed. 

 

By then the excitement has died down, although everyone was still beaming, smiles spread from ear to ear. The staff ushered them out the door towards the main studio and the duo followed, joined by Daehwi who slung his shoulders around Woojin and Samuel. There was a brief moment of confusion when they tried to squeeze through the door at the same time and ended up getting stuck, Youngjae thankfully safe from it since he had hesitated.

 

“Yah, whose fat butt is it?” Daehwi demanded while the rest merely laughed at the youngest’s antics.

 

“Must be yours,” Samuel replied. With a grin, Youngjae retracted his hand from Woojin’s shoulder. His new friend looked back, alarmed, and his eyes widened when he saw what Youngjae was about to do.

 

“Incoming!” Youngjae announced, running forward and slamming into the three males. It worked and the three boys stumbled forward, although the glass door dreadfully shuddered. With his momentum, Youngjae was unable to stop and as his legs tangled with Woojin’s. Both of them fell, only to be caught by those who had left the room earlier, and managed to avoid face planting on the floor.

 

Beaming widely, Youngjae found his feet and thanked Daniel who had caught him. “Three cheers for team bonding!” He whooped, flailing his limbs as he danced wildly around. He might or might not had too much sugar before the announcement of the classes.

 

“What was that? I thought I was hit by an elephant!” Daehwi sassily cocked his head, hands on his hips and Youngjae shrugged before jumping on the boy, arm curled around his shoulder like he's done it before.

 

“Yah-”

 

“It's all great and all, but let's hurry to the main studio, alright?” Sungwoon interrupted, pushing the boys along with an amused huff. With a start, Youngjae realized the rest had already started walking a long time ago, and they were already quite a distance away. The only ones left were the four youngest and the two members from Hotshot.

 

With an indignant shout, Youngjae left for the front group, dragging Woojin along. They caught up fast and settled into comfortable chatter, up until they reached the main studio.

 

Eyes wide in surprise, Youngjae took in the set where the one hundred and one chairs were gone and in its place was a stage with pitch black terraces surrounding it. They walked to the seats the staff waved them to and Youngjae found himself sitting between Taedong and Hyungseob, with the other class trainees sitting behind him.

 

BoA walked in to cheers from the trainees, cue cards on the hand. She took her place in the center of the stage, smiling as she waiting for the boys to quiet down.

 

“So, does anyone know why we are here today?”

 

Youngjae could see everyone shaking their head, although he knew they probably already guess what they were going to do.

 

“I'll give you a hint. In every group, who will be the core of the group?”

 

“Center!” Everyone called the word out with scary synchronization and BoA smiled.

 

“That's right, today will be the Battle For Center! All the trainees in A class will have the opportunity to present a one minute solo stage and voting will be done by all one hundred and one of you, so do keep your eyes wide open. A class, you'll have thirty minutes to prepare a stage for the EDM version of Pick Me.”

 

Youngjae could feel the pressure on him as he received the phone and earpiece the staff handed him, along with a few sheets of blank paper. The rest of the trainees were being ushered out to give the A class trainees space. But even then, the stage was already crowded.

 

“Can I practice at the stands?” He asked the staff and when she gave him the go ahead, he bowed thankfully and ran up the stairs. The EDM version was already thumping through his ears and he already had some choreography in mind.

 

“I'll dance and sing. But no, maybe I should mash season one with season two? No, it won't be interesting, there'll probably be someone doing it…” Youngjae could feel time slipping past him and with it was his anxiousness rising, clogging his throat as his vision blurred.

 

_ Smack! _

 

His hand slapped his face with a loud crack that had those near him jumping, but Youngjae didn't notice. The action had helped him clear his mind up and his heart settled into a more consistent rhythm.

 

“I'll sing the song, and then for dance...” Youngjae threw his pen down, finally standing up to go through the choreography. He went through the one minute with a freestyle dance first, before he tweaked some movements and when the thirty minutes were up, he had his one minute dance stage completed. It wasn't perfect since there was still some areas he could improve, but for that time limit, it was pretty alright. Now the only thing was whether he could pull it off well.


	5. Fifth

Daniel was up first and Youngjae found rapping with the lyric sheet alright, although the PD was probably going to broadcast the distasteful frown some were having on their faces. Little Woojin showed an amazing performance, but Youngjae was blown away by big Woojin’s performance the most. Of course, the ending would have been better with another flip, but then again there was no more space and the music already ended.

Up next was Taedong and Youngjae could see the hopeful looks on the F class trainees faces. His own expectations were rising because Taedong was good, Taedong excelled at dancing but that all came crashing down when Taedong crumbled under the pressure. He felt a twinge of disappointment but it was understandable, the pressure was suffocating him too. And now Youngjae felt an even bigger burden on his shoulders to do well, to make F class look good.

He hopped up the stage when his name was called, shaking his limbs even as his knuckles were turning white around the microphone.

_Inhale- one, two three._

_Exhale- one, two three._

_Inhale- one, two, three._

_Exhale- one, two, three._

Once Youngjae got his breathing under control, he nodded and the music started. His limbs felt as if they were manipulated by the music, muscles tensing even as his arms flowed like water, locking where needed and relaxing when ordered. He went all out for the dance at the start, because his dance would be affected by the loss of one hand since he would be holding the microphone when singing.

He started singing, thankful that his voice came out stable and clear even when it felt like there were snakes writhing inside his body. He didn't do the usual choreography for Pick me, no, that would have been boring. Instead, he went with his own choreographed dance which he thought was pretty well suited for a song like this. When the applause came, it felt more than just polite clapping and Youngjae basked in the moment of pride that his performance had been well received.

Bowing, he left the stage, giving a quiet word of encouragement to Hyungseob. The latter’s performance was however, not well done and Youngjae recognized that he came up to A class mainly through hard work and not skill.

Daehwi was next and the male performed a mash up of season one dance and season two music and it suited him, although Youngjae was still far more impressed with both Woojin’s performance. The rest of the A class performed, with Seongwoo and his popping, and Taehyun with his krumping.

And then it was time to vote and Youngjae found himself standing in front of the box, the main camera staring right at his face.

He wrote down big Woojin’s name unhesitatingly.

“Woojin can be cute if he wants to and I think he’ll suit the center image,” Youngjae said as he dropped his vote into the box.

The voting didn't take much time and pretty soon, BoA was up on stage with the results in her hand. Youngjae would be lying if he said he didn't have any expectation and so he sat still, back ramrod straight even as he fought to keep a poker face.

“The top two are,” BoA calmly read out her cue cards, a small smile on her face. “Media Line, Lee Woojin.”

The boy hopped off his seat at the stand and jogged up the stage, bowing to the rest with a cute grin on his face. Youngjae could feel the tension emitting from the other A class trainees and he felt his own anticipation rising.

“Brand New Music, Lee Daehwi.”

The name resounded around the set and Youngjae couldn't help but feel a pang of disappointment even as he clapped for the relieved boy. The chosen center was Daehwi and then it was setting up of the formation for the live stage. All ninety eight trainees ran through the choreograph thrice before given time to wash up and then they were ushered onto the bus that would take them to Mnet building for the filming of their stage.

Youngjae found himself sitting at the back row of the bus, squashed between Daniel and Daehwi.

“Oh my, what an honor to be sitting beside you, the center! My lowly self simply cannot handle the overwhelming aura of yours,” Youngjae teased and Daehwi mock glared, lips pressed together to prevent the smile threatening to break out from appearing.

“But on to a more serious topic,” Youngjae turned to Daniel and scrutinized the aforementioned male. “How broad are your shoulders because really, I'm squashed here.”

Daniel gave a short bark of laughter, eyes creasing up into tiny slits as he moved away from Youngjae.

“Better?”

“Much! Youngjae might be squashed but he has broad shoulders too so I'm getting the worst of it here,” Samuel piped up from the other end. “Although Daehwi lessens the impact-” Samuel didn't manage to finish his sentence as he tried to fend off the attacks from an angered Daehwi.

When the bus door opened, Samuel was the first to be down, dashing off the bus with Daehwi hot on his heels.

The rest of the trainees followed in amusement and then they were ushered into the building where the makeup stylists touched up their makeup and filming started after running through the rehearsals. There wasn't anything much to do there but the classes were groups together and so Youngjae had more chances interacting with the rest of the A class trainees. He felt a pang in his heart when he saw Minki tearing and having to leave the venue and barely mustered a smile when Hyunbin shot a sad wistful grin at him.

Youngjae was placed at the side, behind Seongwoo. It wasn't a good position to be at, but given that he was already performing the entire song, he wasn't in a position to complain.

“How's the air up there?” Jisung asked jokingly and Youngjae shrugged, swinging his legs as he sat on the stand.

“It's filled with the same amount of nitrogen, oxygen and carbon dioxide.” He cheekily answered and left an amused Jisung as he scrambled to get back to his position.

Filming wrapped up and then they were lead to a floor on the building where they were handed cards to write. The trainees had been notified before the filming that they will be having a fanmeeting later in front of the Produce 101 MYCT shop where they'll be giving out drawstring bags filled with Produce 101 related goods and their handwritten cards. Youngjae found himself a nice quiet corner and was writing his card when he was joined by Guanlin.

“Oh, where's Seonho?”

The younger Cube chick trainee had been sticking to the older chick ever since Guanlin had moved to F class and to see Guanlin alone was a little surprising.

“He was talking to Haknyeon the last time I saw him,” the male replied and Youngjae let out a hum as he returned to his card. He was on his second one when Guanlin let out a frustrated sigh.

“Ah, how do I phrase it?” The latter muttered to himself, hand tugging at his hair in frustration.

Youngjae leant over, and saw Guanlin had struck out more lines than he had written.

“Oh, do you mean ‘I'll do my best, please look after me kindly and don't forget me’?”

When Guanlin shot Youngjae a blank stare, Youngjae repeated the sentence in English. Comprehension dawned on Guanlin’s face and he repeated the sentence, writing it down hurriedly with a murmured thanks.

Youngjae continued with his cards, occasionally answering Guanlin’s questions. When the latter was done with his card, he handed it over to Youngjae.

“Can you help me check for any errors?”

Youngjae glanced through and pointed out the words that were written wrongly. Guanlin corrected them and then transferred the letter to a new card. With the entire conversation having taken place in English, Youngjae was honestly glad he could have someone to talk to in that language. English was his first language but training in Korea required him to communicate more in Korean. Guanlin apparently shared the same sentiment.

Now done with their three cards, the duo stood up to grab their drawstring bags, slipping the cards into them.

“Where did you learn English from?” Guanlin asked, leaning against the wall as they waited for the rest to finish.

“It's my first language. I was born and raised in Singapore and moved here when I was fourteen.”

“Your Korean is good though.”

“My mother had a rule at home. We were only to speak in Korean or Chinese and I loathed Chinese at that time, so I mostly stuck to Korean,” Youngjae said with a grin. “Which is probably why my Chinese is only at the high school standard. I understand more than I can speak and my speech comes out as broken sentences. Mum was horrified.”

“Korean is hard,” Guanlin frowned and Youngjae raised an eyebrow.

“Compared to Chinese?” He challenged and Guanlin shook his head, smiling.

“Chinese is harder,” the boy from Taipei agreed and they both let out chuckles as they followed the staff out of the building and to the MYCT shop.

Youngjae grinned as he jammed a black hat over Guanlin and took a blue one for himself. Mnet had provided the trainees with MYCT clothing and there were so many Youngjae didn't even need to change into his own clothing. But it was always fun to play around in shops and much more fun when you were allowed to.

Shooting a thumbs up at each other, the two same aged friends entertained themselves by working up different poses with the accessories within reach and by the time Youngjae realized there was a camera recording all their antics, it was far too late. The camera had gotten all their ridiculous poses, judging by the satisfied grin on the cameraman’s face.

“Start heading out please!” The staff called and both Guanlin and Youngjae hurriedly took off all the accessories they donned before waving at the camera as they passed by it. The screams that filled the air when the trainees left the shop stunned Youngjae and he could spy a few DSLR cameras in the crowd, the owners already snapping away.

They gathered in one line and bowed, waving at the fans. Youngjae followed the rest but he was a bunch of nerves, wondering if there would be anyone who would recognize him now that Mnet released the individual videos and clips.

They were given some time to give out their drawstring bags and to interact a little with the fans but Youngjae was worried because what if he approached someone and they rejected his drawstring bag because they wanted someone else instead? He clutched at his drawstring bags, Guanlin’s presence beside him comforting.

His worries were put to ease however, when one girl approached him, a big grin on her face as she clutched her handphone in front of her chest, no doubt recording.

“Youngjae, you're very handsome!” She enthused and he could feel the tips of his ears turned red.

“Thank you,” he murmured shyly.

“Voting hasn't started yet but you're my fixed pick! I watched your introduction clip and everyone paled in comparison to you. Ah, I have exams coming up but no motivation to study, can you say something encouraging?”

Youngjae was immensely grateful for the lessons YNB had given trainees in preparation for their debut. It included how to reply to fans amongst others -and also how to walk- but the real thing was different.

“Oh exams! It's really hard to study when you have no motivation,” Youngjae said in sympathy. “But they'll be helpful in achieving your dreams. It's important that you do your best, but health always comes first. Please sleep early and don't be too stressed, I'll be here cheering for you!”

“Ah, wow, you're so charming, really,” the girl gushed. “I'm Choi Minhee, please remember my name! Choi Minhee.”

“Choi Minhee,” Youngjae repeated and she squealed. “Thank you Minhee, please take care and good luck for your exams!” He handed her a drawstring bag while bowing and she took it, staring up at Youngjae with wide eyes. He passed the other two to those standing nearby, bowing and thanking them as the staff begin to usher the fans away from the trainees.

“Kim Youngjae, I love you!” Minhee shouted and this prompted the surrounding fans to shout at the respective trainees they were fans of. Youngjae waved in response, bowing again.

“It kind of feels like we've become idols, doesn't it?” Youngjae muttered to Guanlin who nodded in response.

It was a nice feeling, the warmth coursing through Youngjae as he realized there was someone else who wasn't his family supporting him. It was a thought that made him want to work even harder than before to repay the love given and Youngjae feels that he understood the love the idols have for their fans just a little more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ... ew at my writing.


	6. Sixth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> welp it's been seven months since I last updated and I'm sorry for the lag! Honestly this was written quite a long time ago, I merely edited it a little. 
> 
> Unfortunately, I'll probably not be able to update as fast as I wish, since this year is a very important year for me and I have to focus my attention on my studies. That being said, I feel like this story overall was rather badly written and horribly planned out, so I'll probably be rewriting the entire thing sometime in the future. either that or I'll just continue with it, but I highly doubt so.
> 
> Also, anyone watching idol producer? I can't believe 2 of my top 3 picks are eliminated and all my other picks are dropping in rank :// well if I don't watch ep 10 it just means they aren't eliminated yet :):):

Youngjae was anxious. The number of A class trainees standing beside him were dwindling down and his name has yet to be called.

He fixed his eyes on the crack in the floor and scuffed his foot against it.

“A class… Kim Youngjae.”

Youngjae’s head snapped up and he smiled, bowing at the rest before running over to join his group. 

Their group line up was rather perfect for the song they ended up with. Hyunmin with his acrobats, Hyungseob with his brightness, Taehyun, big Woojin and Eunki with their dance. Youngjae was honestly relieved that he had someone he was close with and two he knew from A class and he stuck close to them. Preparations were going smoothly as Woojin was chosen to be the leader and Eunki the center and they immediately started on the choreography. 

The rest were going through the movements with Taehyun as Youngjae decide to rewatch the part of the dance. The timing felt slightly off but he wanted to confirm it first before bringing it up.

“Oh,” Youngjae said in surprise when he turned around to find Woojin right behind him, eyes fixed on the screen. Together, they watched the moves again. Behind them, the rest fell silent and Youngjae felt another presence joining them.

“It’s a domino though,” Woojin said, voice lilting up in the end so it ended up as a question.

Taehyun shook his head. “No, it's not.”

“Here. Its a one and two,” Woojin pointed out the figures, looking to the oldest for his opinion.

“We can fix it later, let's just finish learning the dance first,” Taehyun patted Woojin on the shoulder as the rest stepped back to their position. Youngjae shot a glance at Woojin. The latter had a slight frown in his face but he got up and joined them.

It wasn't until a few minutes later when they hit another snag. Both Taehyun and Woojin were teaching the same part, but with different choreography and timing. Youngjae could see the rest of the members’ eyes darting to and fro from Woojin to Taehyun and back again.

“No, here, watch,” Taehyun pulled Woojin to the side and started counting, going through the moves as he does so.

Woojin frowned. “Her silhouette makes me distressed, dat dat.” With each word, Woojin pointed to the respective members. “It's in the video.”

The tension was visibly rising.

“So we're going to do it like that?” Taehyun cocked his head. “Ah… you- you decide it,” he gestured at Woojin. The latter resumed to what he was doing before and Taehyun watched for a while before slipping past the group and grabbing a bottle of water, downing it down. Youngjae winced, he could see the producer and editors latching onto this scene and editing it out to be worse than it actually was.

Practice went on alright after that, although Taehyun and Woojin still had conflicting opinions sometimes. They managed to sort it out however, and by the end of the day, the choreography and half of the formations were completed

When Woojin finally called an end to practice, half of the group still in the room were knocked out on the floor and the rest were barely awake, slogging through the dance moves through brute force.

“You’re done?” Youngjae slurred, curled up on the floor when Woojin shook him awake. The latter had been teaching Hyunmin the choreography and the rest of the group had left to move their luggage to the rooms they were assigned. 

“Yep, let's go,” Woojin heaved Youngjae up surprisingly easily for a male 7cm shorter. Youngjae looped an arm around Hyunmin’s and his other around Woojin’s shoulder and proceeded to close his eyes even while walking.

“I'm trusting you won't bang me into any walls,” Youngjae mumbled. His response came in the form of Woojin’s hand snaking around his waist and tugging him closer. The trio made it to the dorms, still as tired as ever even after the walk through the biting cold winter air. To their delight, they found their luggages in the rooms they were assigned to.

“Ah, you're finally back!” Eunki called from his bed. “Wash up and sleep, it's late already.”

Youngjae fell face first on the first bed he made it to and groaned when someone shoved him. “Sleep,” he moaned and a familiar voice tsked above him.

“Shower and then sleep,” Eunki nagged and Youngjae reluctantly allowed himself to be pulled out of bed and ushered into the bathroom. He took a quick bath, and then Woojin washed up while Youngjae brushed his teeth at the sink.

“Good job today,” Youngjae said through a mouthful of foam. “You did great.”

The red headed paused in his furious scrubbing. “...Thank you. You did well too.”

There was no more conversation between them with both too worn out, but he would like to think that Woojin wasn't as furiously scrubbing at himself as before.

***

Trouble came when it was the second day. They were going to be evaluated by the trainers the next day, but the staff came by their practice room and gathered them in a circle before announcing that there will be some changes made.

One of them will have to switch over to Sorry Sorry Team One.

They were left to make a decision in twenty minutes and Youngjae sat quietly as he observed the different expressions on his team members’ faces. Shock, horror, anger, resignation were all shown conflicting with each other. MNet was honestly such an ass. They could have told both teams sooner, but no, they needed time to come to such a decision and this puts both teams at a disadvantage.

No one spoke. It was obvious why they were reluctant. Aside from learning the new choreography and having to find the chemistry with the new group, the opponent was Sorry Sorry Team 2, the all-rounders who were quite possibly the next Avengers team.

“It'll be easier if an A class trainee switches since he'll pick up the choreography faster.” Taehyun broke the silence.

If it was A class, that left four of them. Woojin definitely won't be switching over, he's the leader and owner of ‘Sexy baby, Oh my lady’ that makes Youngjae swoon every time he sees it (Youngjae secretly thought it was the killing part, even if others said otherwise). Taehyun was an integral part of the team even if his and Woojin opinions might clashed sometimes. The only options were Hyungseob and Youngjae and well, when it comes to dancing, Youngjae was clearly the better one. 

“It's me,” Youngjae said, jokingly singing their Pick Me theme song. His joke fell a little flat in the atmosphere, but his efforts were returned with smiles. “Well then, I'll get going. Fighting!” There wasn't much to do by staying around. Youngjae walked out of the room to avoid the awkwardness and headed straight to the Sorry Sorry practice room. 

When he opened the door, the two teams were sitting, clearly awaiting the arrival of their new member or opponent.

“Youngjae!” Seonho cried in delight as he leapt to his feet and flew at the startled male. Limbs wrapped around him and Youngjae laughed, immediately feeling his heart lightening. He bounced Seonho up and down and the younger merely clung on tighter.

When Seonho finally let go, he eagerly dragged Youngjae over to his group. Introductions followed, but even when they were friendly, Youngjae could tell they weren't exactly pleased with the arrangement. He could only vow to work harder.

“Yonggeun was sub vocal three, so you'll replace him,” Minho said and Youngjae nodded after scanning through the lyrics. He wasn't exactly happy with the amount of lines he have, but there were plenty of chances -he hoped- in the future to show what he could do.

The choreography was simple and Youngjae picked it up fast. He could tell the others were impressed with his speed and were currently less angered over the change. It was overall a good thing he had changed, since Hyungseob wouldn't be able to fare as well, and this wasn't Youngjae’s ego speaking.

“Let's break for ten,” Minho called out and Seonho promptly collapsed on the floor.

“Youngjae, are my legs still there? I can't feel them,” Seonho wailed and Youngjae laughed. He sat on Seonho’s legs, careful not to put his full weight on them.

“Feel them now?”

“You're heavy! Get off!” Seonho flailed his legs and Youngjae complied, rolling off Seonho’s legs and onto his torso instead.

“Don't move,” Youngjae ordered. Surprisingly, Seonho listened and was still under Youngjae’s head.

“I'm hungry,” Seonho whined. “Dinner was hours ago and there's no snacks left.” 

Youngjae hummed in reply, intending to close his eyes, but Minho caught his attention. He was talking to Daniel, and the pink-haired male was looking more and more uncomfortable even as he shook his head. The prominent bunny smile since the start of the program had all but disappeared but then Jonghyun cut in and Minho backed away, a displeased look on his face.

“What was that about?” Youngjae sat up and asked, realizing that he might have overstepped his boundaries but curiosity won.

“Nothing you need to know,” Minho snappishly replied as he walked towards Nam Taehyung, barely sparing a cursory glance.

Youngjae frowned. Minho had been treating him like an outsider ever since the start, barely speaking to him unless needed and while the others were better, it seemed the actions of the leader had influence them slightly. Only Seonho and Taehyung were the same, the latter because they had been in the same class for a slight while and thus had interacted.

It wasn't a pleasant feeling but Youngjae can handle it, there's only a few more days before the performance and Sorry Sorry team one will be no more.

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so I got too into Produce 101 so help me and this has been sitting in my iPad for basically too long and screaming for me to let it out so please do comment and share your opinions. I'm a sucker for comments OTL. Criticism also very welcomed :)


End file.
